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? [Aug. 20th, 2006|12:51 pm]
[mood |contemplativecontemplative]

What the hell is that about?

pause* moved into dobbs. offically.

i don't like offices.

i don't like turning parts of me off.

"Lavander Billy, Dilly, Dilly..."
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(no subject) [Jul. 15th, 2006|08:23 am]
[mood |contemplativecontemplative]

@ Dobbs once again. It seems the only down time I've had in the past four weeks comes in the first morning hours of Saturday. The four weeks of hell is almost over. That should clear my reading schedule up a bit. Leave it open for the finishing of The Golden Braid: Godel, Escher and Bach along with a bevy of other books that I have half started. I am pretty sure organic chemistry is on the list next along with the history of Russia. While the history of the Middle East is more pertinent right now- eh, oh well- I know a good chunck of it (Kudos to Barbir and the yaer and a half of independent study tourture). I miss the hard sciences a bunch. I miss lab and blowing stuff up, making mushroom clouds by "accidentally" adding too much Hydrochloric Acid. I miss being challenged by the work that I'm doing. Right now it's simply busy work with education and this English course.

Almost done with school. A few months ago I was sure China was next on slate. Head over there without the language and without knowing anyone. Play it by ear, figure it out, shoot from the hip...mmmmmm lone adventure. Anyway, I am not doing that and instead coming down to Dobbs for good on the 19th. I could have taken the easy way and hopped off to China, but this scares and tantlizes me more then any bounty of opium and spices the Orient might hold. I also figure I should probably begin to acquire fluency in one of the languages I have started to learn: Spanish, French or German.

I would really enjoy simply staying in school forever- there is too much to learn and simply not enough hours in the day if you plan on A) paying bills or B) sleeping, showering, eating...etc. I do not want to have to compromise- to have to pick. I suppose that is one good thing about not going into corporate. Summer's off will allow me to pursure other activities I want to. I can either do more work on my own schedule, take a class, study on my own (much better overall I find...in most things), write, stand on my head and spit nickles out of my mouth. I don't know. But, it does allow me that extra bit of 'freedom.'

Okay enough of this. Time to begin the day. The time has passed when time does not matter. Off to work. Cheers- Vlad
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I don't want to grow up. [Jun. 22nd, 2006|10:51 am]
[mood |contemplativecontemplative]

I feel old.
I have felt old.
I have felt old for some time now.

My time in Albany is offically ending in August. Five and 1/2 years and there is about 2 months to wrap everything up. It will be different to not be able to hole up in HU in my office for hours when I can't sleep. To not walk into Bosco's office at 2am. I do suppose that with Bosco at Harvard being in NYC will make it easier to see him and do research in conjunction with him there. Academia is real small and I have tight connections with many diverse (to put it lightly) parts of the department.

Almost all of my close friends have already left: Laur, Adam and Marg are gone. Albany won't be the same without Adam and very difficult to adjust without him.

I will be farther from Cole Road, which I dislike. I really would like to be able to bop over and see K-Joe's games- to be there to mediate between him and the parental units. Plus my parents are getting older and it would be useful to be around if they need help. They do have Kevin who can do things and Eric... who can sleep.

I wonder about my friends in Cuse. How many people do you keep from high school once you graduate? I kept Walker (I have no choice he has LDJIN with all of my notes in it). I kept a few others that I touch base with every once an awhile: Kimbo, Justin, Mick, Tim, Mike, Teb. I still can't believe that I have kept in touch with Li and J. THAT is going back. Kindergarten and beyond. WOW, people who have been my friend for almost 23 years. That's a long damn time.

I think about the next few years. And then I don't. I have waderlust- still unsaited. I want to do it while I have time, while I can still run the Great Wall. Before a permanent job, before house payments, before kids (I can see all of those looming ahead like the shadow of a falling boulder) I want to do something with all of this evergy I have. I like routine, but I love the unexpected. All arrows point to seeing the world, taking 4 years and travelling- learning languages, getting lost (blisfully lost). All except one. Erik.

One is one. That is all there is. If there was more then one I would take the leap to leave everything here in the States. For the first time I feel as if Home is a person. A singular person. Home is where you return. Home is what you realize is like nothing else. Half of the trip is the beauty of returning Home. I don't need the trip to realize that. I am lucky enough to realize it each time I wake up in him arms, each time he gets back the the apartment... each time he laughs, smiles, opens his eyes...

Stop- you don't want to read that.

Life in the city has been fairly routine. Erik worked. I worked. Erik commuted. I commuted. Made dinner. Did dishes. Went to bed. ::repeat::

Time for news. lifting. lunch. packing.
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In the jungle, the mighty jungle... [Jun. 21st, 2006|04:12 pm]
[mood |restlessrestless]

(this part will be public)

It is bad news for the Bunny when the Lioness becomes territorial.

She does not sleep tonight... come and dance with the Devil in the pale moonlight.
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123456 SWITCH 654321 [Mar. 30th, 2006|05:32 pm]
[Current Location |UA]
[mood |boredbored]
[music |repeating radio]

Slowly going crazy. It would be nice to be required to use more than a handful of neurons... both at work and at school.

My only two lightbulb moments have came from reading.
Finally time to read- reading Diary. Quick, easy, good. Real good.
Have been e-mailing for 5 hours, so Mal is slightly on autopilot. (REEEAAAAAAAALLLLL BOOOORED)

Sarita will be in Albany-nia soon. Good news.
HOME for summer- Best news.

If have to hear the same 40 god damn songs on repeat I am going to begin to slowly, carefully impale cutomers.
On school note- supervisor was supposed to show and didn't. If she was an employee of mine I would have fired her ass the second time she was late. (Note for those who are not me nor Ben: She is late everytime). Class was *mehe*. (Technical sound for not challenging). Maybe if I had to teach with pots, pans and Germans storming the classroom- then I may have to begin to tempt some slight form of effort.

Ran into Chris today. (Rizzo). Set up time to meet with him next week and play catch up. Brilliant literary and all around brilliant mind. I am glad that I saw him, even happier that I know him.

Went around the corner last night. Stopped at Pasean's for some free food then bounced on to the Crow. Finally spent time with Jay. Heard all about how his kids at Albany High are giving him advice on hair and clothes. Played some darts. Drank some beer. Yuengling was out- for the record not cool. But if that was my largest gripe of the evening, then it was a decent night.

Few more min's till close, time to wrap up the day. Until then. Vlad out.
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Quick Update [Mar. 11th, 2006|11:17 am]
[mood |amusedamused]
[music |B&N radio. (now Sweet Child of Mine)]

At work...
*cheers for Barnes and Nobles Saturdays*
Store will be dead in about 45 min's. Since the big game vs. Vermont.

Tim and I are no longer together. So that's fun- and that's funny. Things are (for now) still amiable. Ben and I had a conversation about the post breakup ettiquette, since a great deal of time and money went in on both parts. Are you supposed to give back all gifts of value? This has to do more with his side than mine. I am giving back the ring of course- I don't want it. But, does he then give back his gifts that are over a certain dollar value? This was by far the most serious relationship I was in and need some feedback on this. I was always a firm beliver that once a gift is given it is given- that is it. If you no longer want it as to no be reminded of that person you are free to do with it what you will- burn it, bury it, give it away...whatever you decide.

But movement is constant. Progress is mandatory. Move, move faster, move smarter. Smarter becomes the problem for many. Unwilling to risk- unwilling to change, they stagnate in the status quo, the norm. To become complacent is to stand still. Stand still while others move- you fall behind in stasis. Stand for something! Pick a stance, defend it. (Not like the Maginot Line). Don't get caught up in worrying about things you have no control over. Don't get upset of minor incidents. Work for a solution. Engage yourself and don't rely on others to do that for you. How can you bear your own company if you constantly self depricate? If you hate your company that much...imagine how much others do. (Okay I have to leave this here or it will become situated on an single individual).
Rock the boat. Jump out of the boat. Invent a new boat. Attack other boats.

Task of the day: Get hockey tickets to the ECAC Playoffs for Friday and Saturday. (check)

Yea hockey! Live actual hockey players a few feet from Erik and me! That's phenomenal. I haven't been to see a hockey game since, well I can barely remember seeing the Detroit Red Wings for the first time. My Baumpa has season tickets to the Red Wings and to the Wolverines...and he spends both seasons in a condo in Arizona. At least I know if I want to take the tickets when I'm out that way I can. Why would you retire to a condo? Or to Arizona? All that desert and heat? Old people have old skin. Old skin is dry skin. Dry skin is made drier by the heat.

Thinking about getting old- more later. Time to get back to the ol' grindstone.

Work Hard.
Play Hard.
Win Easy.
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Wow [Jan. 11th, 2006|10:00 pm]
[mood |contemplativecontemplative]
[music |Silenco]

Last few months- busy, work, not seeing friends, being bored with major, wanting out of Albany, finding a reason to stay in Albany for the time being, not getting enough sleep, going camping at Dippikill, going into a ditch in the snow- being towed out, finding the "equal", silence, more silence, lots of traveling, missing family, loving things I excell at, planning trips to Schroon, deciding to be in a triathlon, missing Adam- Rob- Amanda, longing for summer, finding skating and discovering I love it, reading some, more work, more work, more work...more work...Batman, marshmellows, more skating, more camping, learning about widgets, finding that groove, waking up each time I open my eyes, feeling entirely clam for the first time (ever), wanting a bull whip and realizing I own a mace (kudos to Erik and Paul), knowing Ker keeps me sane at work some days, laughing when there is nothing else to do, finding out you are indeed an island... always and never(in short) -VTI out.
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! [Aug. 31st, 2005|09:25 am]
[mood |chipperchipper]
[music |Summertime Blues]

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(no subject) [Aug. 21st, 2005|10:39 am]
[mood |awakeawake]

Back in Albany now- worked about 10 hours yesterday...so not as long as I guessed we would. I now can tell you with precision accuracy the ISBN's for the four major books that were not in stock, the professors, the section numbers and the prices. I know who is teaching what courses and who assigned how many books- I feel like a compendium of Fall 2005 textbook knowledge.

The lake was *Auto response from Mallory (10:31:00 AM): I had this REALLY great apple yesterday... Amanda (10:31:15 AM): omg Amanda (10:31:17 AM): it was so good Amanda (10:31:23 AM): i just couldn't help myself Amanda (10:31:28 AM): I had to have another Amanda (10:31:35 AM): even though I knew it would give me a stomachache Amanda (10:31:41 AM): but wow Amanda (10:31:42 AM): just wow Amanda (10:31:53 AM): there are no other words for how great this apple was* wonderful as I expected. There were many errands and trips into tow. It seemed that everytime Tim and I began to relax there was something else to do- either that or we would wake up with a list of things to do "Go to the dentist, go to the optomtrist, go get oil changed..." So I got to SLEEP at the lake, and Thursday was nice- we   did   not   go   anywhere. And Friday was the end of vacation (* hangs head* no lake, no longer...) I still want to make a trip back to Syracuse go to the NYS fair- and also for Tim's birthday in August. Both with work and school will not be possible. So I will head to Geneseo on the 16th to celebrate his birthday- by that time I will have time in so I can take time off at Chartwell's.

I have to relay the story of Tim's optomotrist appointment, but Morrowind is calling my name.

When video games beckon- one must rise to the occasion. :)

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wow [Aug. 11th, 2005|02:43 am]
[mood |apatheticapathetic]

...and I'm going home...

...perhaps I should stay in Albany...

...perhaps in the morning it will be better...
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